It’s just I’m refuse to be who I’m not. It’s not a matter of ego or fear or unfairness. It’s about loosing yourself to someone or something you know it’s not meant to be. It showed in people face when they hide something or dishonest. We’ve come to know that there are many reasons for that, human has lots of aspects in their life. But when the reason is made up to give one holy conclusion, which I believe human is not holy they’re dirty as it can be, the reason doesn’t make sense at all. This actually contradict with one sense on achieving good, they think what make sense is when they’re try to achieve goodness as an absolute purpose. I never think that way. What make sense is to let everything has natural deed, has natural act coming from her/his own desire, their own being based on their perceived value (value can come from religion too, this is why religion is important in a person development). When people act as if goodness is a purpose, problem occurs as how they’re gonna achieve that and how the goodness is perceive. And so when the goodness is an absolute purpose, the way on getting there will be inferior sometimes trivial, value could be lost. In fact, a dishonest reason and using absolute words coming from wishful thinking, means you have give up the control to those wishful thinking (and everything behind those wishful thinking). You will not becoming you anymore. This is a problem since this could provide a fast way to being good without having to understand the values. And when those problem going large (since wishful thinking is somewhat difficult to achieve), you will be tempted to ignore it. And if what you ignore is somewhat larger than you (depends on what behind the wishful thinking), it will haunt you forever unless you try to deal with it. Or becoming a droid and pass your ESQ test. Then there will be more wishful thinking escalating the sin that you should commit to cover up the old problem. Then you think this is a grown up game. Well, a game isn’t played by a grown up.
Lying is a sin. You’re lying because you want to lie and make sin, not because you serve good purpose. This will create problem as you think you can expect goodness from lying. You can’t expect goodness after you’re lying. Expect responsibility for your sin, then you could have His blessed way. I know I commit sins many times but I don’t expect goodness out of it. But, you place the burden on me to create goodness out of your sin, and instead of goodness, I have to deal with the result of all of your sins combined in the name of my goodness. What standard for goodness is it in your liking that I should accomplished? Normal goodness for whom? Special people has special goodness? And so, those other people that you think is not special is not deserve my standard of goodness? What senses that I should use to comprehend such a despicable act? This can’t be dealt with love only.
Do I ever mention that the sin is coming from your failure to deal with God and His creation not from double crossing the wishful thinking? Why then do I think you keep paying your sin by fulfilling the wishful thinking? What makes matter worse is that fulfilling wishful thinking comes with a whole bunch of creativity. Which sometimes very creative and transform into a new movement. This makes it more appealing to young generation and “smart” people without them realizing that the real value has gone for “good”. Especially when the creativity is directed by unknown forces, wakes up!
I’m not doing things haphazardly because I know I’m only human that always tempted to commit a sin. If you think you’re human then you should be fear for sin. There’s a song that has a lyric that stated if I’m committing sin then that is sensible since I’m only human. This is the problem. First: Sin is tolerable since we’re only human. Second, we could fruits the sin into goodness. Third, the sin can be forgiven since God is forgiving. Wow a lot of reason to not fear to sin then? Remember FFF? You’re not fear to sin then you’re not fear to God. Period. Who else do you fear then? Has no fear to anything that against God, no matter the consequences are.
Also God is the highest, and always is. You’re not gonna get close to Him no matter what, nor does your hand resembles His hand. It is when you dealt with His mighty power and His creation then you think you’re close to Him. You respect your God by subdued to His power, praised Him and have affection to His creation.
When you try to control my environment anyway you can, then you becoming the handler of the door to my judgment day. In what sense do you think you have capabilities to have such a powerful job? The environment, those people, those animals you’re trying to manipulate to manipulate me are His creation and so am I, and so are you. Playing something here huh? How do you expect God to forgive you if you couldn’t respect Him? It’s in the power of God that He creates man with the ability to feel, think and learn. It’s in the power of God that He creates uncertainty for His creation since He is the one with ultimate power. I refuse to subdued to any power other than Him.
I don’t think I would stop doing what I’m doing now, until you understand what makes you you as to now, which will prevent you to go mad when things are started to falling apart before your eyes and you start to wondering who’s to blame. In every situation, try not to conclude anything but connecting it.
Note: For a full 3D effect, has water sprayed under your face.