There is a reason why I haven’t make many friends for some time, I realize that there is something different going on and I guess I just refuse the presumably normal condition. Besides, even from their attitude and their tempt to do something inappropriate and reckless have give me a warning that they’re not “good” as they think they’re. They’re bad but they just haven’t realized it yet.
Many people have draw a blur line between good and bad, they’re what they’re, and they like to be invisible. Many of them get used to this situation whether they’re active doers or passive doers. They’re in the collective mind depicting the world as injustice and cruel. While the active doers are invisible because they’re prominent in the society, the passive doers watch with jealousy until the condition reasonable or safe enough. We’re all wanting to remain invisible when becoming the evil doers right? And so, when the time of this invisibility comes around, no one even bother to think the extraordinary event of doing they depict as usual while the situation is not. What makes the condition reasonable and safe in a massive scale is what makes the situation not usual. Suddenly every one get green light for doing bad. Sadly, bad actions are invisible but the consequences are visible. This is where things started to go bad. Consequences are mounting and bad things happen.
And so where were we in this kind of situation? You see, I’m conditioned to be visible, I realized this years ago. Accordingly, I shouldn’t move freely like anyone else having the chances for reckless doing. I got intuition that I’m being scrutinized. This kind of visibility should give me a sign to drive cautiously since anything bad means bad. Ignoring the sign will cost me trouble. Also, all of my friends are actually hand picked to acknowledge something is wrong, each of them has credibility (smart enough) to do just that and already tested without their knowledge. But they weren’t able realizing this since they think they’re still invisible. Well, now we know that is not the case. I’m artificially visible and so are their actions. So, if my friends decide to do something artificially “bad” on me, then assume it is visibly bad. This is all just a set up so we could have a chance to undo or lessen the consequences only when all of us mature enough to acknowledge a problem.
You see, friends also have necessities. What your friends think minor mischief to stay on top wouldn’t hurt them very much, they’re wrong. They’re all unfortunately has voluntarily become executioner, in order to maintain their position. This is worsen by the fact that they need a salvation. I can’t make them understand about the problem that lies upon their hand (their necessities speak louder) and so I need to shield myself from them. This is when I’m not doing what they want me to do. This is when I lost them.
You see, the only thing I can do is when something is not right, not get along with my comprehension, I get out fast. No matter how sweet and generous the person attitude might be. You lose friends, but they’re not losing themselves and I’m not losing myself.
Unfortunately, I’m not alone being in this peculiar situation. Some of my close friends are visible too. They need to understand their condition is far from normal, so they need to maintain their guard. This is a contradiction from the popular believe that everything will be okay, which is not helping and ruining actually. You can’t expect living your life like the rest of the people after what you knew. I’m sorry, but that’s the way it is.